President Trump’s Corona medical team, the three medical amigos, Dr. Carson, Phil and Oz, have determined that some of the predictions of the bone-throwers were off by a few thousand deaths. It was clear that additional expertise was needed before opening the schools to get a real handle on this Corona disease. The president does not want to get the school re-openings wrong – there is just too much at stake! After a substantial search of the most prestigious game show hosts and wheel spinners this country has ever produced, and with persuasion from Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil, they were able to talk Chuck Woolery into preparing a Corona Prediction Wheel for school re-openings. This method, coupled with seances and star alignment, will guarantee the safe and timely re-opening of our schools.
Alice Reports from the Land of Oz 