After extensive investigations in conjunction with Marahesh Marish Yogi have determined without any doubt that the source of the Corona virus was a laboratory in Hunan, China. This determination was made by data-driven statistical mentalism at the Hopkins Culinary Institute.
It is suspected that Chinese scientists working for the Democratic Party were experimenting with a super virus derived from the brains of certain bats. They had called in Dr. Carson to deal the with possibility that the bat brain may reveal some of the logic behind Presidents Trump’s recent actions. During brain probes of a bat that had recently digested the blood of a 9-day-old chicken, Dr. Oz farted. That gas mixed with some strange bat brain germ and Shazam!! — the Corona virus was born! escaping through the drawers of Dr. Oz.
Alice Reports from the Land of Oz 